People: Have you heard the baby shark song? Me:
Confession: I didn’t want to create Homemakerish U. My signature course, that now has almost 1200 mamas enrolled in it, almost didn’t happen. . . I knew when I started Mother Like a Boss that I wanted to serve moms in a big way. I wasn’t just after a business, I was looking to start a movement. But as more and more people asked me to help them with home management and homemaking, I pulled away. I didn’t want to be know for that. I didn’t want to sell a course like that. . . The reason? Fear. I was scared that no one would buy it. Scared that moms who did would hate it. Scared that I wasn’t good enough. Scared that I wasn’t expert enough. Mostly I was scared to be the guru when I was living a perfectly imperfect life myself. . . My house isn’t always immaculate. My laundry is sometimes piled up waiting for 2 days for me to put it away. My kids eat cereal for dinner some nights. I’m not a guru. I’m a positive motherhood and homemaking ambassador. . . Homemakerish U isn’t about teaching you to be a better homemaker. It’s about equipping you with the tools to make homemaking better. You’re worthy of a better life, a more joyful life, an uncomplicated home. “I’m drowning” shouldn’t be the answer to the question, “How are you feeling today?” I created this course for moms, by moms. Real motherhood and real homemaking, for moms who are tired of riding the hot mess express aimlessly. . . Homemakerish U was created for modern homemakers. The only thing missing is you. We’re open for enrollment and ready to see you inside. Bit.ly/hulive
Let me be very clear and open with you. Homemaking isn't about " a woman's work." It isn't about setting the women's movement back or falling into antiquated, often harmful roles in society. Homemaking is just that: making a home. The best way to make your home is to be the delegator, the manager. Not the one doing it all. But pretending that because we live in a modern world things like homemaking don't exist is ludicrous. I'm a rockstar modern business CEO running a company and a team, and homemaking is still at the top of my priority list. ..When my house is clean, I feel good. ..When we have clean towels instead of moldy, wet ones to use after a shower, I feel good. ..When my kids put their own laundry away, I feel good. ..When my husband pitches in each day, I feel good. ..When I make dinner for my family and they love it, I feel good. ..When we're all settled for the day, sprawled out on the sectional, a family of 4 that feels safe, comfortable and peaceful in our home, I feel good. Homemaking is something I do, it isn't who I am. I am Kendra Hennessy. Homemaker is a role I take on, just like wife, mom, sister, daughter, granddaughter, niece, friend and leader. But I also won't feel guilty about it. I won't pretend that my house doesn't need attention and love just because it's 2018 and our traditional roles have changed. I'm proud to be a homemaker. I'm proud to be a mom who cares about her home and her children, and is guiding them to see the value of helping in the house no matter what their gender is. I'm proud to spread the message to other moms and help them 1 by 1 become less afraid of asking for help. When we make blanket statements like, "It's not that hard. Just get it together." or "Ugh, I'm so sick of hearing about homemaking. Get your husband to help!" we push some mom, somewhere back to square one, where she feels guilty and judged for needing help. We throw a blanket of shame over her and cause her to retreat back to her corner of motherhood, lonely and still just as lost. . It’s not always easy, but it CAN be uncomplicated. Join the workshop and learn how to finally uncomplicate your homemaker-ish. Link in bio.
HONEST POST: I haven’t always felt like a great mom. In fact, a few years into this little dude’s life, I felt more like a failure. When my oldest came along, I felt like a total winner for years. She was brought to us with a light, go-with-the-flow demeanor and I mistakenly believed that it somehow reflected how I was as a mother. So, conversely, when our son didn’t bless us with such a flow-going personality, I believed again that it was a reflection of me. . When he didn’t pick up his toys at the time of my choosing, when he didn’t eat the meals I made, when he stomped his tiny toddler feet in frustration, I didn’t meet him where he was. I got angry and depressed, because I internalized it as a reflection on me as a mother and overall homemaker. Why did I do it all right the first time and not this time? Why didn’t my house feel the same anymore? Why didn’t my son understand that this is what I needed him to do? . Because it wasn’t his job! It isn’t the job of our children to fill us up or make us feel like good parents. It isn’t their duty to please us or meet the conditions each day that we set up for our happiness and fulfillment. Our joy at home shouldn’t be dependent on how “good” or “bad” a child was that day. We base our worth as mothers, as wives, as homemakers on an arbitrary set of expectations that our children either exceed or fail to meet on a daily basis. . And even those expectations change with our moods (admit it, ladies…) One day a simple quick toy cleanup suffices and the next, they are “doing it all wrong.” It isn’t about them. It’s about us. We’ve been force-fed complicated beliefs about running a home and I’m setting out to stop it. Because for me, the stresses I felt as a parent directly correlated to the perfectionism I was seeking (and not getting) in my own house. No more. Let’s end it now. . Living a life without regret in my heart doesn’t meet that I don’t often wish I could go back and uncomplicate all the days that I made things so much more stressful than they needed to be. That I took more time to be patient and speak kindly and less time trying to be perfect. Join me to uncomplicate YOUR homemaker-ish. Link in bio 🙌🏼
🙅🏼Newsflash: Motherhood doesn’t have to look (or feel) like this! I've been giving a lot of thought to how overly complicated our society makes motherhood and homemaking, and I'm ready to stop the nonsense. There is a lot of noise out there. A lot of emphasis on perfectionism and "either or" motherhood. You're either June Cleaver or it's Disaster Town. It's time to uncomplicate it and get back down to basics. You can handle this. You were made to be the CEO of your family. Because live workshops are my absolute favorite way to serve you, I created a brand spankin' new class called Uncomplicate Your Homemaker-ish: A 5 step, excuse-cutting crash course on the basics of home management and simplifying your life even if you have no idea where to start. And because I'm all about that replay, no trouble (see what I did there) I am giving you THREE chances to watch me live. I'll be doing this class as a series and you have three chances to catch it. Even if none work for you, there WILL be a replay. Come on, did you see my witty quip above? Sign up and join me on... August 8 @12pm Eastern August 9 @2pm Eastern August 14 @7pm Eastern Sign up for one, or all. It's up to you! It's the same class and I will be live each time. In this free, live class, you’ll learn: ✅ Why your excuses are holding you back and how to get rid of them for good. ✅ How I was able to get out of my overwhelmingly complicated household routines after years of “mommy perfectionism” (and how you can do the same. No magic or special potions here) ✅ 5 actionable, straightforward steps you can take to finally uncomplicate your home and how it’s run (and how to involve everyone in your family, too because you don’t need to do this alone, mama!) ✅ Simple mindset shifts that will help you rid your life of perfectionism and stop procrastinating so you can live your best mom life, the life you deserve No more drowning in a sea of to-do lists that ultimately never get done. Or pinning #alltherecipes on Pinterest in hopes that the meals would just plan and cook themselves. Or worse, avoiding having your best girlfriends over for coffee out of house shame. Save your spot now! [link in bio]
We love screen time in our home. We don’t go out of our way to intentionally limit it to only specific times of the day. Instead, my husband and I have always trusted our guts and parenthood intuition. We allow tablet, iPad or TV time when it feels good and when it’s been enough time, we turn it off. Period. . Our children have always been independent and imaginative players. While they love Minecraft and a good Blippi video, they understand that there is more to a delightful childhood than a screen can offer. This is one of my favorite things about my children and I could listen to them play all day. . Today, my son spent the better part of the morning drawing, coloring and cutting out paper Pac-Man characters. He used them to chase himself around the house yelling “um-uh um-uh um-uh” (ya know, the Pac-Man sound...) . Screens are great. Technology is beautiful and helpful and educational. But so is paper. And crayons. And an imaginative spirit. And the very load sounds of a 5 year old imitating a vintage video game. #motherhoodsimplified #simplechildhood #pacman #screentime #motherlikeaboss #homemakerish #momsofig #kidsofig
During a photoshoot yesterday, we took about 1000 photos. Hallelujah digital. Digital photography was invented for moms trying to get a good photo with kids, I am sure of it. You can take 10,000 shots to get that one where someone isn't picking their nose, sneezing or rolling their eyes. . . We got some beautiful photos for all things Mother Like a Boss brand, but this one stuck out to me. I was about to delete it when I realized this is THE perfect photo to encapsulate motherhood and the expectations we put on ourselves. We kept asking my son to sit up straight, smile, not touch his face or put his hands down his pants. We told him to turn around, look at the camera and put on a happy face. We set expectations for him that he just wasn't ready to meet. . . Expectations are a joy killer. We liken them to goals, but in reality, expectations are set in fantasy, in perfectionism. They are created not to accomplish "best care scenario" but out of "perfect case scenario." Expectations don't take into account outside variables (in this case, a tired, cranky, hangry 5 year old) or the feelings of others. They are about what you think you want in the moment. Expectations set us up for feeling like failures. . . How much of what we do as moms is based on expectations? We expect our kids to help, and when they don't we're disappointed. We expect our spouse to take out the garbage and when he doesn't, we passive aggressively express our unhappiness. We expect ourselves to be everything to everyone and when we can't, we feel like a failure, unworthy of praise for all we are doing well. . . I'm actively working toward a life where I am expecting less and allowing more. Allowing ideas to flow to me about what I truly want. Allowing my children to do what is asked of them in a way that feels good to them as long as it's within our home's core values. Allowing myself to be open to learning how to be better without needing to be perfect. . . A homemakerish life isn't based on high expectations. It's based on abundant and joyful allowing, even if it means that somedays, this is the best picture you get out of your children.
Just a beautiful photo in a crisp white shirt taken in between yelling “GET AWAY FROM THE WATER!” at the kids and smearing pink lipstick on my collar an hour after wearing it. I am entitling this photo “I can teach you how to clean your house, but can’t be trusted with white shirts” 📸 and makeup by @by_shanglam #modernhomemaking #homemakerish #happyhomemaker #motherlikeaboss #momlifebelike #motherhoodsimplified
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